|May 08 2012|
|Oct 13 2010|
I love a good mystery. Something that you really can't figure out until the very end. A good book, or a movie that really leaves you hanging up until the very last revelation. But something I don't like is mystery of myself. Like how do I feel? Or why am I so angry? Why me? Why?
Sometimes I catch myself wondering why for just about everything. The funny thing is I'm sure...
|Oct 04 2010|
For the longest time I've been not too fond of myself. I pick at everything. And of course that makes me miserable. I'm never happy in the moment or content. But I went to BSF (bible study fellowship) which is this pretty hardcore bible study that you have to sign up for like 6 months in advance. Anyway, we talked about some stuff and it got me thinking on the way back. I'm a very e...
|Oct 03 2010|
So ever since I got out of the hospital I have been trying the coping skills I learned while I was there. Today I had to use them a lot. I would get very anxious and what I did was I would count. Iwould count until the anxious feeling went away and it worked pretty well. I started to feel depressed later today at around 8 so I took the meds I'm suppose to take at night and took a shower. An...
|Oct 01 2010|
Just got a blood test done this week. I'm not pregnant :( In fact I have been having menopause symptoms for almost a year now and I didn't have my period at all this month. I have an appointmentmonday with a doctor, but I will continue to see what happens. I'm trying to not let it get me down and to remain optimistic. If I start thinking about it, I become sad. But I'm sure they...
|Sep 21 2010|
So I'm weaning of Geodon then Welbutrin will be next, then cymbalta. Not all at the same time, but slowly. Well the Geodon has been hard to wean off of and I've been having a hard time withthe crazy withdrawel symptoms. So I tried benadryl which helped at first. But now I've found something better! It's called Ambien. Wooo My doctor prescribed this to me because I wasn't sle...
|Sep 19 2010|
|Sep 13 2010|
I know that I have been manic for at least a month now and it seems to be getting worse. I am extremely hypersexual, my brain feels tingly and weird and my body feels extremely restless and energetic. My heart feels like its raising and I've been either extremely happy, angry, anxious or sad. But they have all been extremes. And I feel like I've been having more symptoms besides these....
|Sep 12 2010|
I've probably never really told anyone this, but I am a very sensitive and empathetic person. I hate, absolutely hate, anything to do with cruelty to any creature whether animal or human. I hatethat there is so much evil and sin in the world and sometimes I just want Jesus to return already so we can all live together and be happy. So you could say that sometimes I have a hard time coping w...
|Jun 30 2010|
|Jun 22 2010|
So my book is out on Amazon which is exciting. It's called Ithika and I also have a blog its http://ithikaworld.blogspot.com/ if you are curiousabout the book. I'll be posting some stuff about it.
Anyhoo my eating disorder relapsed and I've been struggeling with that. I've been binging and purging for a few weeks up unti...
|Jun 10 2010|
|May 11 2010|
|May 03 2010|
After my hospitalization, I was put on Welbutrin and Zyprexa. And it has made such a difference! I feel alert and energetic. I can function! I haven't felt this good in a while. I'm stillgoing part time at work for the summer with hope that I will be healthy enough to do fulltime in the fall. Medication is a wonderful thing!...
|Apr 30 2010|
|Apr 15 2010|
|Apr 13 2010|
|Apr 09 2010|
Today was probably the worst day I have ever had while I've been working at my job. First my boss switched for cross training with someone who has know idea what he is doing about a month ago. That alone was stressful. But the guy who is supposedly in charge of the area I work at keeps leaving every day which adds more stress because I automatically take on his responsibilities. So I've...
|Mar 29 2010|
|Mar 23 2010|
It has been a while since I wrote in the diary. Mainly because nothing really special has happened as of late. And again, the day is just as mundane as before. Although this weekend I went to Gatlynburg, TN which was quite enjoyable. There is a Dollywood there and other hillbilly/country entertainment food, skiing etc. I'm not particularly into the whole country thing but, I enjoyed it just...
|Mar 17 2010|
|Mar 16 2010|
|Mar 15 2010|
|Mar 15 2010|
|Mar 12 2010|