|Mar 14 2010|
I found a smaller townhouse....2 bedrooms instead of 3....and no family room...just enough space for Jaclyn and I in the same nice area that we are in now...and it will save me over $100 a month. :) That should help me quite a bit with my monthly budget. Utilities will be less 2 as I'll be heating and cooling 2 floors instead of 3. Brad is looking at another apt. today before they decide where they will go. He seems a bit excited about getting his own place. I'm hoping that this will be a good thing for all of us.
My parents got home from vacation yesterday. She called to see "how things were". I told her Brad is moving out and that Jaclyn and I may be moving too. I told her that I've been looking at my whole financial picture and that I could pay off all of my debt with a loan against my 401k with a 6% interest rate instead of the high credit card interest etc. that I'm currently paying. But, I have an outstanding loan amount of $3k that I'd have to pay first in order to take another loan (the plan stipulates one loan at a time). she and my step-father have no financial woes. They have serveral vacation homes etc. I asked if I could borrow $3k for a few weeks while the transaction to pay off one loan and take another would occur. I got the "well, we'll discuss it, what are you going to use it for, are you trying to find a way to go on that cruise with Al this year etc."? I hung up and cried. I have pieced my relationship back with my mom since my divorce 5 years ago...she wasn't supportive of it, although she knew that I'd tried to make it work with an alcoholic for almost 18 years. I was given the "suck it up speech and treated like a real black sheep for a few years for leaving my husband." My mom now says, "I never realized how bad his drinking was...etc." she has apologized a million times and I have done my best to forgive her. But, she never seems to trust my judgement and it hurts. I'm obviously not an idiot, am I? I also got the "Can Brad really afford to move out? quiz." i told her that "I think he can, but if he can't make it, he'll need to pick up another job as I can't support him for the rest of my life and him living with me seems to encourage him to relapse." She said, "I know...etc." But, I still feel judged.
I sent my father an email asking for his help. I don't know what his financial picture looks like, and I told him that if he could loan me the money for 3 weeks it would be very appreciated. If he can't, I'll ask my sister and her husband etc. I'm just hurt and angry that no one can ever seem to just be supportive of me without making me feel like a loser. I put myself through college, paid my car payment and insurance while i went and worked 3 jobs. I bought our first home (I do mean I, as my ex stood outside with the kids while I made the offer). I've made every financial decision alone my entire life. Sometimes things never change...good thing I'm strong, I guess. I'll get through this and then I'll get an apology that they were't easier on me with things. these are the same parents that pay all of my brothers bills. I just wanted to borrow for 3 weeks..shame on me...sigh
life goes on...
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