I cried the whole way to work today! Then when I got to work I cried. I did ok for the next couple of hours then I went on my break. I talked to the HR rep and found out that I can get 3 free councelingsessions and my husband can come. I am trying to get him to but I am going irrigaurdless. I need it bad. To top it off I saw him twice today. He stopped into my work and I stopped at the house to get a few more things. That was very hard. I must have cried 6 times at work today. They are trying to get me to take a leave of absence, that would only make things worse! I hate my life, I hate my self. I feel like I do nothing right. I really dont think I am ever going to feel good about myself again! Why should I? No one is giving me any reason to. Even my mother is critisizing me and I am helping her out tremendously. I am nothing but a big fat loser and its being proven over and over daily! I wish I was never born!