I feel so hopeless. I Dont think my meds are helping much. The only thing that is any different is my leg cramps are gone. And that was a different sort of pain, one that I could actually rub withoutcrying.

I am becoming more and more depressed every day. I am supposed to go to a Lynx game this afternoon and I am PRAYING that the friend that I am supposed to go with doesnt call me. I just dont even want to go anymore. I already know I am not going to have/be any fun. And walking all thoes steps is gonna be a blast! Plus I am not a sports fan. She just had an extra ticket and wanted me to go.

My ears are now to the point where they are ringing contantly and it bothers me. I just really dont want to make an appointment to get my hearing checked because we just dont have the money. What if there is a problem there too? We wouldnt be able to afford to fix it anyway.

I seriously wish my husband would tell me to leave him  I am putting him into debt again. I feel so bad about all my medical bills. I did apply for assistance through park nicollet because we owe so much money to them the sent an aplication with our bill. Im pretty sure we make too much money. Usually we do in those situations. I have to be getting pretty colse to my donut hole where I will have to pay 100% of my medical bills for the next $1500.00 untill I reach my deductable. then things will really be fun.

Life just sucks and I dont see it getting any better. When?? When is it going to get any better for me? Never thats when. I will be broke and in pain forever. Thats how it seems. I am tired of it!