Pretty soon here they are going to put me in the nut house! I called the pain clinic this morning because I hurt so bad and I even took my full days dose of methadone and it didn't help at all! I was honest and told them what I did, but the lady on the phone was such a bitch that I started crying and told her that I wanted to put my fentanyl patch back on because at least that way even if it wasn't helping with the pain it would make me sleep for the next 3 days and I wouldnt be aware that I was in pain.

 So, now I have to go in a week early, bring my pain meds with me so I can give them to them. Which by the way I think is a crock of shit considering I had to pay for them! What if they decide to put me on a higher dose of it, I woild have had some to start with. I just don't like it. Are they going to destroy it or are they going to use it themselves or give it away to another patient??

I dont have the money for this! Now I have to come up with 2 bucks for parking not to mention money for new meds. I am 33 years old and have to go begging my mom and dad for money to get medications because I cant afford them.

I WISH I WAS DEAD! GOD TAKE ME ALREADY! WHAT ARE YOU KEEPING ME HERE FOR???? I DON"T UNDERSTAND!