Dear mama |
Apr 18 2012 |
"Dear Mama"
... Dear Mommy,
I know you think I am crazy
You think I am a burden
You think I'm lazy
Mental illness was the source of all my hurting
Research gives answers
Transfers the blame
To you and those doctors
And the pharmaceutical game
Poisons for a cure
At 13 years old
The thought had allure
An easy fix you were told
But instead of depression
Psychotic rage took over
And with medical aggression
They upped the dosage
Until I was wild
With the pain in my mind
And ready to fight
When I realized
The monsters in my head
Put there by you and my father
By dad's violence and your constant dread
And my sisters desire to play mother
Did it ever ring bells
I wasn't the anomaly
That every member was in hell
Of our stupid fuckin family
Yes I am different
I am more advanced
You saw special as broken
Under this delusional trance
Reap what you sow
But I'm saner than ever
Don't threaten me now
I've got the strength to sever
From this sick cycle of torture
That's been spinning me
Like a horrendous storm
Since I was old enough to see
The violence in his mind
The death in your own
Neither of you will fight
For the feeling of home
Fuck it mama
I feel guilty now
You're the sick one mama
And you could never see how....
... Dear Mommy,
I know you think I am crazy
You think I am a burden
You think I'm lazy
Mental illness was the source of all my hurting
Research gives answers
Transfers the blame
To you and those doctors
And the pharmaceutical game
Poisons for a cure
At 13 years old
The thought had allure
An easy fix you were told
But instead of depression
Psychotic rage took over
And with medical aggression
They upped the dosage
Until I was wild
With the pain in my mind
And ready to fight
When I realized
The monsters in my head
Put there by you and my father
By dad's violence and your constant dread
And my sisters desire to play mother
Did it ever ring bells
I wasn't the anomaly
That every member was in hell
Of our stupid fuckin family
Yes I am different
I am more advanced
You saw special as broken
Under this delusional trance
Reap what you sow
But I'm saner than ever
Don't threaten me now
I've got the strength to sever
From this sick cycle of torture
That's been spinning me
Like a horrendous storm
Since I was old enough to see
The violence in his mind
The death in your own
Neither of you will fight
For the feeling of home
Fuck it mama
I feel guilty now
You're the sick one mama
And you could never see how....
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