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Zahc Once the title of a failed blog I attempted, which can still be found, I believe, somewhere lost in Google Land, which I may try to resurrect, it is now a collection of thoughts, ideas, and dreams, very much influenced by the Lupus/Fibro/Chronic Pain I have; this enterprize--too--may fail, and I very much crave your kind support, truthful comments, and encouragement as I try to find my way, and--in doing so-- hope to offer the same to all who suffer even as I do.
There can be no pretention; there will be no lies, nor deception. Or false hopes.
In search of honesty and awareness, I can only offer up my prayers, thoughts, aspirations.
The 'Postern Of Fate' is but a gate, beyond which lay the uncertainties of the real world; inside lies the refuge, the comfort, security and sanctuary that we make of our homes, to guard against the unknowable.
All I have to offer is my limited and personal insight. Though, I readily offer--too--a ready ear, and--I hope, an open heart.
And--as always--I wish all 'well days' and peaceful nights.
Love,
'Zahc'
...Read More


"Sometimes, When Tired Agoraphobics Would Dream To Roam"

Jul 02 2012


" Sometimes, When Tired Agoraphobes Would Dream To Roam "

07/02/12

To my very, very dearest friends, supportive, and ever kind, and to the most loyal, caring readers...a gentle, sad, though accurate lament,

I

Sometimes, when tired agoraphobes would dream to roam,
to lift one's eyes beyond the front door's edge,
or, peering ever past the curtains of a window ledge,
to try to think of being somewhere besides home.

II

His traveling thoughts, would not for one second hesitate
To throw things willy-nilly in a bag or two
In rushing to an unknown destination, new,
except to seek a long-time friend, in another State.


III

To fly into their older arms to be reclaimed;
for who would but laugh at now greying hair
that once-perhaps-seemed thick and fair.
And of the faces lined with time, no one need be ashamed.

IV

To find that years of passing time had disappeared,
Though old stories now seem fresh and new;
While they pause-perhaps-to share a drink or two
and, laughing, find nothing to be feared.


V

Why does that sudden sight reflect regret,
For in those passing decades, other lives were found, and other friends.
And that subsequent feeling of discomfort grows, and sends
The humbled Agoraphobe into a frightening realization, and yet,


VI


He had-perhaps-thrown measured caution all away,
While thinking," Was I stupid, reckless, wanting, needing,
And so, confused, and lost, and almost pleading?"
" How can I make up my goodbyes, all fond intentions-now in shards-and stay?"


VII

The journey back is but as silent as a sigh.
The now-encroaching masses causes pain
There's too much noise and too much rain,
"I must get safely home, for this resounding anxiety demands returning hours fly.

VIII

Upon arriving home, the house-thank God still seems unchanged,
Except, for the astute Agoraphobe, a clouded layer of dust.
No matter, for the all-consuming quiet is a must,
And, never will such a headlong flight be arranged.


IX

Though then rooms look somewhat greyer, everything still seems the same.
There's medicine, and comfort here,
And to the true Agoraphobe these things provide some cheer.
Content-briefly-to only see beyond the curtain, or the door, and there...ever most content to there remain.


End

Please always know I love you,

‘Zahc'



Previous diary posts by Zahc:
Comments (5)Add Comment
written by Tenar, July 02, 2012
Ah, my dear, life is not all or nothing. We'll burst you out of the agoraphobe bubble yet.
written by herblovnmom, July 03, 2012
That was so touching. I could feel it in my spirit smilies/smiley.gif Thank you for sharing your work with us...
written by Irishangel88, July 03, 2012
I feel warm inside after reading that....your posts/diary entries are like liquid gold.
written by STRENUBA, July 06, 2012
I love your writing my friend. But, perhaps, in VII, "There's too much noise and too much rain", I might have said, "too much disdain", but I am just giving my opinion. "Rain" is just as good.
I spend most of my time at home myself. I love the line, "a clouded layer of dust", oh yeah. MMM HMhh. I have dust all around, if I could but clean it! And "the all-consuming quiet is a must", absolutely.
Very nicely done my friend. I enjoyed it immensely. Keep up the wonderful writing.
Bryan
written by mabri, July 06, 2012
Zahc,
Again, there are no words to express the beautiful words, and meaning of your writings. Just remember, I am your biggest fan! HUGS

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